What Up, China?

China sucks. China is undergoing a transportation crisis and most of the world doesn’t know about it. China doesn’t like the “outside” world to know how much they really suck. Millions of travelers are hanging out in overcrowded airports and train stations because of power shortages and a heavy travel season related to the Lunar New Year. They are short on coal to generate electricity. This shortage is good for West Virginia because America has plenty of coal to peddle. “Wang Ching, you want coal? We sell you coal. We love you long time.”

Big government equals big problems. Don’t cover up, China. It is clear that your population works for pennies on the dollar because your water supply is contaminated with lead. Your country of communists is slowly turning retarded because of the heavy metals. America busted you on this last year when you tried to poison our youth with pretty toys covered with lead paint. In America heavy metal is equated with the Stones, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, and the Who – not freaking poison. We figured out 50 years ago lead will kick your ass so we cut back on it and sue the tar out of anyone screwing up.

China does not “sue” they kill. The leaders of the toy industry that screwed up with lead based paint were executed. Not lying folks. The solution was a hasty trial followed up with a gangster Glock-Glock to the head. “Yo, Wang, Glock.” What might be the outcome of an entire country forced to live in the streets for a week, whining and ill-tempered? The answer is simple enough: G-L-O-C-K. Yep, all you soccer moms out there opposing the death penalty and preparing to vote for H-I-L-L-A-R-Y should pull you heads out of your asses. The pretty little toys under the Christmas tree, your purse, the ice scrapper in the trunk, and all that is plastic and cheap is supported by Chinese radical communists who believe in Glock-Glock as a sensible business and governmental solution to decision making.

Jesus never visited China for a reason; he didn’t like them and didn’t want to save them. Jesus knew that they would support North Korea, lead paint and hasty executions. This is why God is punishing China today, and this is why West Virginia will profit from their sins. Gadabout is watching you, China. Gadabout sees the truth.

Have a Merry Lead-Free Christmas

The Spirit of Christmas

Sub-prime mess ensues
We buy Wii and X-boxes
Beneath plastic trees

Gadabout believes that during this time of the year many of us run here and there, just to get there and here. We scoop up “deals” to place under hastily decorated, store bought plastic Christmas trees. Work schedules and demands of careers steer us in this direction. A direction that is sometimes directionless, and we lost our personal compass that we once held in times past. Good directions and an accurate compass are not always readily at hand. That’s why moments of silence and reflection, away from the hurry of daily living, can engender memories of what is truly good and worthy of praise in life and living.

So, if you are in denial and are one of those people arrested and bound by the very effective commercialization of Christmas, then have a ball. Rage through the mall to buy little Sally with snot running out of her nose her favorite gift as dictated by sparkling advertisements on television. Use that Visa card to scoff up all those shiny toys manufactured by child slave labor in China and other communistic environs. Lead paint for all!

Good luck to all of you this season of family and friendships in finding direction and recovering that neglected compass, or not. I wish and hope the Spirit flows through your heart and soul with great intensity. Oh, and if you are buying gifts for Gadabout, I’ll take the Wii.

Your Friend,

Gadabout J. Jack