Thursday, January 3, 2008

Dolphins, Ponies and Shoes – Lesson 2

Just Friends

He has desire
She taunts, teases and placates
A free oil change

The pitfalls of being “just friends” are deep and treacherous, and must be avoided at all costs. There are times in a man’s life when he is confronted with the dilemma of meeting a chick he really digs and wants to have a relationship with, but the woman is only interested in a “man friend” who possesses the skills to fix automobiles, bicycles and heating systems. Of course going out for dinners and movies is also a part her “plan” when there is a void in the suitor market. This happens at least once in a man’s lifetime where we find ourselves blinded by beauty and hormones, but we must learn from these mistakes and avoid a second or third prison term at all costs.

Young men should be briefed by their elder mentors concerning the trap of becoming a “male friend.” It doesn’t have to be a lengthy talk, and it does not need to address the birds and the bees either. It just needs to be simple, straight forward and to the point. And the point is that if all you are getting out of the “friendship” is bloody knuckles from changing the oil on her neglected car then it is time to throw in the towel and join the local rugby team.

That’s what real dudes do; play sports and get sweaty. They don’t hang out with women who use them like sugar and flour as ingredients for their favorite dessert. No, if their car isn’t working they can take it to the shop like everyone else. Have fun on your days off from the office and you’ll most likely find that after the game, when you are drinking beer with your buddies, there might be some hot number hanging out wishing she could have a chance to smell your pheromones.


Never waste your time being a “male friend” to a needy and manipulative chick.

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