American League Might

Tomorrow we celebrate our mid-season baseball classic, the All Star Game. Hockey and Basketball are behind us now, and we are focusing our collective attention on Baseball (thank God!). This a great time of the year! It is hot, we are vacationing, and baseball dominates television programming. The game starts at 8:25 PM EDT. Late in the evening, yes, but worth it.

Now, Gadabout plays favorites when it comes to baseball. He is a big fan of the American League, and even a bigger fan of the Detroit Tigers. Gadabout grew up watching Tiger greats like Al Kaline (Hall of Fame), Mickey Lolich (3 game winning pitcher in the 68 World Series), Denny McLain (31 game winning pitcher in 1968, and convicted felon). The entire ’68 team was unstoppable. The Tigers have had up and down years since then, like most teams, but throughout it all I have remained a loyal and steadfast fan despite many dark years. Hey, they took the American League Pennant last year! And the won the 84 World Series! Respectable!

Now, if you are a Tiger fan like me, then you are going to be an American League fan. It's just that simple. Besides Detroit, the American League boasts the Red Sox, White Sox, Yankees, Indians, Orioles, A’s, Blue Jays, Twins, Mariners, Royals, Angels Devil Rays and Rangers. About the only thing that could make the American League perfect, would be if the Cubs jumped ship and joined its ranks. Everybody loves the Cubs. You are not human if you don’t like the Cubbies! The League lost the Brewers during a reorganization a few years back. That was a loss—a team has to be fun with a name like the “Brewers.” Oh well.

Since incorporation of inter-league play, the American league has cleaned up. This year’s scorecard shows a 134-115 lopsided advantage for the AL. It was the same story last year too. “Spank!” Two of the three cellar teams in the AL; Texas and Kansas City, recorded winning records during inter-league play. Nine of the fourteen AL teams have winning inter-league play records this year, three have loosing records and the remaining two teams were .500.

The National League is winless in the past 10 match-ups. There was a 7-7 tie in 2002, but no W’s for the NL since 1996. This year’s match up will be hosted by San Francisco. Grab a six pack of beer, fire up the grill and sit back, relax and enjoy our most American and cherished Classic. “We live for this!” Go AL!

Lost In Translation - Bob Harris sings More Than This

Gadabout trys not to abuse youTube for material, but Slag asked, so I feel I must post. Hold back the tears!

Surf Fishing Mystery Uncovered

Surf Fishing

Casting lines from shore
Thrust into winds, surf and wave
Total consciousness

Gadabout has uncovered a rather curious and seemingly unproductive American pastime. Since Gadabout lives off the tranquil shores of the peaceful and mysterious Chesapeake Bay, he is afforded many opportunities to observe aquatic life forms, sun seekers, joggers, dog walkers, sunsets, thunderstorms and fishermen. Of all there is to do and see along the two miles of shoreline, the most baffling are the surf fishermen. Surf Fishers (SFs) line the banks near a bridge (Lesner Bridge) along the western mouth of the Lynnhaven basin (the heart of Virginia Beach), where they cast lines and wait patiently for a nibble. After 6 years of living here and taking daily walks and jogs along this stretch of beach I have never seen a single fish pulled in from the shore. I have witnessed a few successes from those who wade out 40 feet or so and cast closer to the channel, but never have I actually seen anyone pull in a catch from the shoreline.

SFs are a serious crowd, despite their humble failures. They are usually outfitted with elaborate and expensive gear and tackle. They use white PVC piping that is drilled into the ground to secure their poles. Some of the more advanced SFs own specially designed equipment transportation carts that incorporate special tires to ease soft sand movement. These carts are capable of carrying everything required for a day of fishing; beer, bait, radio, fishing poles, meditation chairs and towels. Very impressive!

Impressive? Yes. Productive? No. They may not be a productive lot, but they certainly seem to enjoy and embrace their pastime. Perhaps it is an advanced form of meditation not shared with the rest of us. Maybe they are achieving a state of consciousness unimaginable to the Dalai Lamas. We're talking serious Zen here! Gadabout is seeking to understand this unusual sliver of the population. Their existence has been uncovered, but a complete understanding of their motives and purposes remains a mystery. This story has only just begun.

I have included photos that were secretly taken on the morning of 7 July, 2007. They are not close-ups, since Gadabout feared being detected, but they do provide proof of their existence and support my claims that they never actually catch fish.

Roxy Music - More Than This

Gadabout has always thought More Than This to be one of the most beautiful songs ever written. I had the rare opportunity to see Bryan Ferry live and listen to him sing this classic at the Olympic Theater of Seattle in 2000. I sat in the front row and never blinked an eye the entire evening. It was a riveting experience. God bless you, Bryan, for sharing your talents with the world.

Music binds us together as a society. Music is beautiful and radiant. I am guessing there is plenty of music in heaven, where as hell most likely plays music backwards. Maybe in hell you have to listen to the Beatles White Album over and over again. Not in heaven though, you only have to listen to the Beatles if you really want to. Yep, music is good, it provides us a soothing medium with which we can share our passions and beliefs with others. Music brings peace.

More Than This

I could feel at the time
There was no way of knowing
Fallen leaves in the night
Who can say where they're blowing
As free as the wind
And hopefully learning
Why the sea on the tide
Has no way of turning
CHORUS
More than this-there is nothing
More than this-tell me one thing
More than this-there is nothing
It was fun for a while
There was no way of knowing
Like a dream in the night
Who can say where we're going
No care in the world
Maybe I'm learning
Why the sea on the tide
Has no way of turning


Note from Gadabout: Youtube has over 100 metric foot tons of Roxy Music videos!

Dear Gadabout

Gadabout likes reading “Dear Abby” and other advice giver columnists, but not really for the advice. I like to understand how really f$%&ed up the American populace is, which provides comfort to Gadabout knowing that he is actually well balanced compared to his fellow citizens. The advice is usually dry, soft and conservative. “You should contact a mental health care provider as soon as possible.” Nice work ladies. I could suggest calling social services or “taking a cool approach to the situation,” but that’s not what Gadabout is all about. I possess the keen ability to detect truths distorted by false claims and self pity. This “awareness” is often a burden, and I carry it humbly and with great respect.

Okay, this morning I read about a bride-to-be seeking advice on how to address her alcoholic mother’s potential belligerent behavior at the upcoming wedding reception. “Should I invite her?” “Should I demand that she refrain from drinking?” The advice giver offered the usual diatribe outlining, in less than 125 words, that the situation should be addressed immediately, and so on and so forth.

Here is Gadabout’s advice to “Bride in the Midwest:”

Dear Bride: You’ll never keep your mother from boozing it up, so stop trying and get on with your life. No, you won’t be able to keep Mom from attending the ceremony and she’ll show up at the reception whether you like it or not. Any attempt to keep Mommy from attending will worsen the situation and possibly lead to out of control behaviors, violence and binge drinking. Simply put, you’ll just piss everyone off. Look, everyone knows your mother is a drunk and makes a fool out herself at public gatherings. By now the future in-laws are certainly aware of this since you are making your family secrets and issues public by writing to a nationally syndicated columnist. Chances are that she was a normal woman, full of dreams and aspirations until she got married and was forced to raise a family of screaming and over demanding children. Lastly, alcoholism is a disease, your mother is sick, show some compassion. Focus on the details of the wedding, let your mother booze it up and smile when you deposit all the wedding checks into your savings account. Count your blessings!

Time and Friendships

Gadabout was offered, and accepted, a very generous invitation to have dinner with old friends last night. It had been too long since we had last broken bread together, and chance events of fate brought me into their home for beers, steaks and blessings. When you are invited into a family’s home and spend a few short moments as part of that family, you are touched by the finger tips of goodness and grace. Exceptional families are exceptional to be with, and make you feel like you are genuinely a member of the clan. Gadabout felt as if he was part of the clan last night, as he once had years ago.

The last time I recall spending time with the Gordon’s was probably 15 years ago. The kids were runts back then, running around the house as children do. But that was 15 years ago and now those kids are adults—successful adults. Rip is a full fledged pilot and towers over me. Kate is into the arts and lives in San Francisco. Rob will be finishing college soon. They all grew up, while Gadabout grew apart. Life is funny that way. One day people are an important part of your life, and the next you become aware of lost years that have drifted by, spoiled by neglect.

Hey, Gordon Clan thanks for the dinner, wine, conversation and the many blessings bestowed upon me in my quiet and gentle quest of understanding the true meaning of life and the everlasting importance friendships. I hope others learn from this experience. Can I come over next week for dinner?

Rocketing Markets and Retirement Plans

5 Year Dow Chart
1 Year Dow Chart
Gadabout has been sitting on edge, watching as all major USA stock indices have soared over the past 5 years. The DOW is up over 20% the past year alone, and up nearly 90% from 5 years ago. This rather rapid growth is not slowing and has a different feel from the late 90’s dot com boom. The 90’s were frenzy years, highlighted by throwing money at the markets based upon emotion where fortunes were made and lost over just a few years. Today, despite war and contentious relationships in DC, the markets are silently jogging up smooth pathways. No hype, just pure money making, and it is not a newsworthy event.

Gadabout believes that part of the resilience is attributed to government employees and their supplemental retirement plans. These plans are called Thrift Savings Plans (TSP), and most employees maximize their allowed deposits of around $15,000 annually. TSPs offer only a handful of options ranging from government securities to index funds. There are over 22 million government employees (the statistics are more difficult to break down than I thought, so errors are expected in the numbers I am throwing about, but they are close) and if only half are maxing out their accounts $165 billion dollars is being invested in US stocks and bonds annually.

The uniqueness of these deposits is that they are stable. Stable in the sense that they are not likely to be liquidated since penalties would be applied if withdraws are made. They are essentially 401Ks for governmental employees. These accounts are also invisible to their owners. Once set up, deposits are automatic and continue to pump cash into the markets regardless of market performance. The word “predictability” comes to mind.

We started off with the IRA experiment in the 70’s, 401Ks and there similar instruments in the 80’s, and rocketing TSP participation in the 90’s and the new millennium. The middle class is joining forces with the upper classes through active participation in these programs, and future outcomes may prove dramatic. Consider that as retirements increase over the upcoming decades, retirees will likely have IRA, 401K, legacy retirement plans and social security to pay the bills. Even low level government employees making less than $45,000 per year, will be retiring with 3 retirement plans—excluding social security. I think that is real progress and this may be the most remarkable story not being told—except by Gadabout Jack that is.

I am keeping my humble assets invested in the markets, and if I take a fall, no matter because it feels so good at the moment! Why say no, when it feels so good to say yes?

The Flag Goes By

After enjoying my morning Venti Half Caf and reading the local newspaper this morning, Gadabout unfurled his fifty-something year old Old Glory and displayed it with great care and humility above his garage. He did so sharply at 0800 hours, and snapped a picture for posterity (shown above). At nine o’clock, I reconnoitered the neighborhood and found that my flag is flying solo. Maybe everyone forgot today is the 4th of July. The editors at the newspaper may have forgotten too since the main stories on the front page were about dangerous dogs (I found this interesting), the costs of decommissioning nuclear submarines, navy day care and boat taxes. The front page of the Local section featured navy day care, a winery that suffered wind damage, Beach nightclubs seeking an injunction against regulators and a piece about the how Portsmouth’s school superintendent looks like President Bush. To the paper’s credit, they did note (in very small type) locations of fireworks at ONE location for each city in the Tidewater area.

Well, I guess the 4th of July isn’t really newsworthy. It comes around every year on the same day—it is predictable like that. Just as predictable as Christmas, Groundhog Day, Valentine’s Day, and Saint Patrick’s Day. Other holidays float about to ensure they fall on either a Monday or Friday, so as to schedule three day weekends. But the 4th does not fall over a weekend this year, and slipping in on a Wednesday makes the prospect of a four day weekend an impossibility. This is an inconvenience for Americans since it is difficult prepare properly for annual celebrations when you have to show up at the office on Tuesday. Add the fact that Thursday is a workday too, and you have all the ingredients for a boring, lackluster affair with little to do. If you can’t drink a case of Bud at a backyard barbeque or get slammed at a nightclub, what’s the point? Right?

Okay, enough of the sarcasm. Below is Gadabout’s favorite 4th of July Poem, written by Henry Holcomb Bennett. Share it with the family, and have a safe and enjoyable holiday.

The Flag Goes By


Hats off!
Along the street there comes
A blare of bugles, a ruffle of drums,
A flash of color beneath the sky:
Hats off!
The flag is passing by!

Blue and crimson and white it shines,
Over the steel-tipped, ordered lines.
Hats off!
The colors before us fly;
But more than a flag is passing by.

Sea-fights and land-fights, grim and great,
Fought to make and to save the State:
Weary marches and sinking ships;
Cheers of victory on dying lips;

Days of plenty and years of peace;
March of a strong land’s swift increase;
Equal justice, right and law,
Stately honor and reverend awe;

Sign of a nation, great and strong
To ward her people from foreign wrong:
Pride and glory and honor,--all
Live in the colors to stand or fall.

Hats off!
Along the street there comes
A blare of bugles, a ruffle of drums;
And loyal hearts are beating high:
Hats off!
The flag is passing by!

F-14 Tomcats Go To Heaven

Yesterday
Today
Like many former Tomcat flyers, Gadabout was horrified, but not surprised, that the mothballed fleet is being destroyed. Those wonderful Tomcats are being chewed up at a hefty cost of $37 million, so as to keep spare parts out of the hands of the evil Iranian Air Force. Since Iran still keeps a few older model Tomcats flying, the demand for spare parts has increased over time and what better source of hard to find parts is there other than the DOD? When there is a buck to be made, there will always be a few enterprising traitors who will sacrifice national security to keep food on the table.

When aircraft are built for military purposes, more than just airplanes are delivered. Lots of other stuff comes along with the deal. Sort of like getting married, you don’t just get the bride; you end up with the in-laws, 100 pairs of shoes, friends from college and so forth. Fighter jets come with spare parts, engines, support systems, special tools, logistic programs and training systems. Lastly, funds are set aside during the acquisition cycle to cover destruction and disposal costs. That’s why the unit cost of military systems seems incredibly high to the casual observer. Bet you didn’t know that!

In this case, it appears that too many spare parts were not properly managed or destroyed and they ended up on the black market. Very embarrassing for Uncle Sam. So, like so often in governmental decision making, the solution was to throw cash at the problem and destroy all traces of the once mighty Tomcat; even for those resting peacefully in hallowed Valhalla (also know as Davis-Monthan Air Force Base). It is not likely that any spare parts were actually vulnerable at Davis-Monthan, but that doesn’t really matter. What matters is that the DOD won’t tolerate further embarrassment, so everything must be destroyed—now and forever.

Gadabout is guessing that a few individuals in high ranking positions got slapped around for this breach of security. Read that to mean they were fired, reassigned asked to leave. Hit the road!

Now, don’t believe that the true cost of disposal is actually $37 million; it is most likely many times that amount. There must have been an extensive investigation when problems initially surfaced. Once identified, money was probably tossed around in failed attempts to fix the problem. Then the studies were commissioned. Consulting firms competed for contracts and published various reports outlining various options for consideration. Thousands of hours were then expended in meetings and briefings at numerous locations. Yep, this $37 million is the final cost, and most likely they’ll need more cash to finish the job. Remember, there are hazardous materials in those fighter planes, and disposing of those materials will be expensive.

Good bye, my fine Tomcat friend. At least you went out with a bang, and grabbed the national limelight one final time before your very sad demise. Rest peacefully knowing that you will be missed by many.

Gadabout's History Lesson

Alert!

The sky is falling
Upon blind, sheltered Lemmings
Talking on iPhones

Gadabout believes that the health of the economy is much healthier than most of us are led to believe. Yes, some people are scrapping by and facing challenging hardships, but for the vast majority all is coming up roses. During the presidential election of 1980 (the first presidential election Gadabout voted in), candidate Reagan proposed the question, “Do you feel better off today than you did 4 years ago?” Those were powerful words that led to a landslide election victory. For the benefit of younger readers, the country was a mess in 1980. Home interest rates were above 15% (that’s right, 15%), unemployment was nearly 10% and personal income was flat. We were in the dumps! Gadabout joined the military after graduating from the number 1 Mechanical Engineering College in the state because there weren’t any jobs!

If you have been keeping an open ear to the endless campaign rhetoric, then you have noticed that the dialog never touches upon a skyrocketing stock market, low unemployment, a firm housing market (excluding a rather small correction the past year), and an upbeat national personality. We are led to believe that the rich are too rich (yes, I believe we should examine taxing the super rich), we are loosing a war and the health care system is out of whack. Yep, we need to work on all of these areas and make further progress, but Gadabout feels better today than he did 4 years ago. Except for being 4 years older and feeling the years in my hips and knees, I certainly don’t feel worse.

Look, Apple’s iPhone sold 500,000 units during its debut weekend. $500 for a phone! How bad can things be in the country when we are all running around celebrating paying $500 for a phone when Verizon will give you one for FREE if you sign up for a 2 year service plan? Americans like feeling bad and depressed regardless of their personal successes and fortunes. The Talking Heads tell us the sky is falling, so we all seek shelter and hitch a ride on the “bitch and moan” bandwagon. In the 70’s and 80’s very few could have afforded a $500 dollar phone, let alone buy a new car or home. Come on, folks; the cold war is history, we are working and creating, and paying our bills on time!

Last point—do you spend more money on your pet’s health care than your own? Yeah, I thought so.